Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
That's what I heard in my head last Wednesday night in an ice cream parlor while I was close to orgasm while eating four huge scoops of Chocolate Mocha Chip ice cream with about four inches of rich foamy whipped cream on top.
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
Sitting on my right was Brad, who also looked close to orgasm while he was eating his four huge scoops of Coffee Almond Fudge ice cream with about four inches of rich foamy whipped cream on top.
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
There were four other people at our table. My best friend, Tyler, and his girlfriend. Brad's best friend, Amanda, and her boyfriend.
The heat and humidity had gotten to us all so we met at this really cool ice cream parlor that's been there since 1969. It's actually a huge ice cream / family style restaurant and it was totally packed, as usual, with a line of people going all the way outside waiting to get in.
So we were all sitting there having the best time, joking about what an "ice cream induced" orgasm would be like, and I look up and across the dining room, I see this guy I went to high school with. Not just "any" guy, but the Asshole Boy who organized a couple of his friends to jump me behind the school when I was 16 and beat the shit out of me, calling me all kinds of choice names like faggot, cocksucker, pervert, etc. He's the guy I wrote about on July 15, 2011.
He was sitting at a booth with this girl I also went to school with. Her name is Lisa and she was out at school as a lesbian. So, what the hell is Lisa doing sitting across the booth from Asshole Boy? I actually met her when I joined the Gay-Straight Alliance after getting gay bashed. I never really got to know her really well. I was actually a little intimidated by her. She had this attitude that the lesbians really didn't have much in common with the gay guys, or people who were bi, so she only would really have anything to do with the other girls. Oh well, to each his or her own, I guess.
But, what was this asshole gay-basher doing sitting and socializing with this lesbian? They seemed to be laughing and having a pretty good old time together.
I don't know exactly how to describe what happened to me next. I just zoned out and noticed I was having all kinds of trouble breathing. I actually started sweating (and we were in this really comfortable air-conditioned ice cream parlor).
It was only like about 5 seconds after noticing him that I found my body getting up from the table where we were. Brad asked what I was doing and I sorta came back from the zone I was in and sat back down.
I told everybody who the guy was, and they all looked over at him. I then just said I was going over there to talk to him.
Well, they all said I should just sit down for a few minutes and map out how to handle it. I sat back down and, to be honest, couldn't take in what Brad and everybody was saying to me. Every second I was getting madder and madder. Actually it was more like rage I was feeling, not mad.
Then the rage went into fury and I swear I was ready to walk over there and grab this asshole into standing up so I could knock the shit out of him. Never mind we were in a restaurant with about 75 or 80 other people. Never mind that I might get physically hurt all over again. Never mind I might get arrested. Never mind nothing! All I wanted to do at that precise moment was get revenge.
From what I could see, Asshole Boy hadn't grown much physically from when he was in high school. I knew I was bigger physically than him and probably in a lot better shape. In the span of about 15 seconds I was playing out this whole revenge fantasy. My focus was getting narrower and narrower. All I wanted was to pay him back for what he did to me when I was 16.
Somehow, Brad was able to get through to me. He was squarely facing me and had his hands on my arms, holding me tight. All I remember him saying was my name, over and over, trying to get my attention refocused.
Amanda's boyfriend had no clue what all this was about and he jumped in and tried to get me to tell him the story of what happened. I guess he figured if he could divert my attention, then I might start thinking rationally again.
What everybody said helped get me back to a good place. I was thinking more rationally again and was starting to get my breath back and chill down again.
I also started remembering what my older brother told me after I had been attacked by Asshole Boy and his gang. I remembered him giving me all kinds of support and advice at the time. My parents had gone to the school and reported it to the principal and then went to Asshole Boy's parents to talk to them. My brother really stuck by me for the longest time afterwards.
After weeks passed and my bruises healed, I was feeling calmer, mainly because I knew I was loved and cared for. When I would talk about revenge against Asshole Boy, I remember my brother holding me really tight and saying such incredibly loving things to me. He also advised me to...
But here I was all these years later and it all came rushing back toward me. I felt like I had to do something. It was the first time I had run into him after all these years and I didn't want to loose this opportunity to at least say something.
I decided to go over to his booth and I had it all worked out what I wanted to say and do. I told Brad and everybody to keep an eye on what was about to happen. If necessary, I asked them to head over to his booth to back me up.
Somehow I wasn't the least bit afraid this time.
I walked over to the booth, leaned over, stretched both my arms straight out and planted my palms down on the table and looked Asshole Boy straight in the eyes. I locked my stare on his eyes, but said hello to Lisa. I got no response from her. I guess she was still in her "no gender mixing" stance. Oh well.
Then I said to Asshole Boy, "How you doin', man? You remember me, don't you?" He stared back at me, then looked down at his plate.
I said, "Surely you haven't forgotten that nickname you gave me in high school, have you? Let me see..... Oh yeah, 'Cocksucker' is what you called me. That ring any bells, sweetheart?"
He started to slide out of the booth but it was one of those booths with a barrier on one side, and I was blocking the other side. I quickly moved in and sat down next to him and by moving in with a of of determination, I was able to shove him back in. I didn't take my eyes off him. Lisa was saying nothing.
I said to him, "So, I think we have a score to settle. And whether you like it or not, it's going to be settled tonight." He still said nothing.
All I said next was, "We're going to get out of this booth -- right now -- and the two of us walk out of here. There's a group of my friends sitting right over there who are going to follow us, too. They're not leaving my side until this score is settled in full."
I looked over at Lisa and said, "Thanks, honey, for taking care of the bill here. Real nice seeing you again."
Brad met me at the door and I told him me and Asshole Boy were taking a walk down the street to the park to talk. He said they would follow and would stay close by.
While we were walking to the park I noticed that he was still that scrawny little kid he was in high school. That's probably why he needed help from his Asshole Buddies to hold me down while he kicked the shit out of me. Now I easily stood 3 or 4 inches taller than him and I was definitely in better physical shape.
So we get to the park and I see Brad and the others a short distance away. Me and Asshole Boy sat down on the park bench and didn't say anything for a few minutes. I admit I was hoping he was sweating and in a panic inside while we were just sitting there all quiet.
Then I got things started by asking him, "So, you know why we're here, right?" That's when the shit hit the fan.
It's easy to tell about something after it's over, but while it's happening, it's all just one thing after another flipping past your eyes.
I'm still trying to get my bearings back after what happened. This was not an easy night -- for him or me. The dog was awake. The dog was barking. There were certain things I knew I had to say and do. Some I regret. Some I'm glad about.
Right this exact moment, while I'm writing this, I need to calm myself down. I'll try to finish this tomorrow.
So we were all sitting there having the best time, joking about what an "ice cream induced" orgasm would be like, and I look up and across the dining room, I see this guy I went to high school with. Not just "any" guy, but the Asshole Boy who organized a couple of his friends to jump me behind the school when I was 16 and beat the shit out of me, calling me all kinds of choice names like faggot, cocksucker, pervert, etc. He's the guy I wrote about on July 15, 2011.
He was sitting at a booth with this girl I also went to school with. Her name is Lisa and she was out at school as a lesbian. So, what the hell is Lisa doing sitting across the booth from Asshole Boy? I actually met her when I joined the Gay-Straight Alliance after getting gay bashed. I never really got to know her really well. I was actually a little intimidated by her. She had this attitude that the lesbians really didn't have much in common with the gay guys, or people who were bi, so she only would really have anything to do with the other girls. Oh well, to each his or her own, I guess.
But, what was this asshole gay-basher doing sitting and socializing with this lesbian? They seemed to be laughing and having a pretty good old time together.
I don't know exactly how to describe what happened to me next. I just zoned out and noticed I was having all kinds of trouble breathing. I actually started sweating (and we were in this really comfortable air-conditioned ice cream parlor).
It was only like about 5 seconds after noticing him that I found my body getting up from the table where we were. Brad asked what I was doing and I sorta came back from the zone I was in and sat back down.
I told everybody who the guy was, and they all looked over at him. I then just said I was going over there to talk to him.
Well, they all said I should just sit down for a few minutes and map out how to handle it. I sat back down and, to be honest, couldn't take in what Brad and everybody was saying to me. Every second I was getting madder and madder. Actually it was more like rage I was feeling, not mad.
Then the rage went into fury and I swear I was ready to walk over there and grab this asshole into standing up so I could knock the shit out of him. Never mind we were in a restaurant with about 75 or 80 other people. Never mind that I might get physically hurt all over again. Never mind I might get arrested. Never mind nothing! All I wanted to do at that precise moment was get revenge.
From what I could see, Asshole Boy hadn't grown much physically from when he was in high school. I knew I was bigger physically than him and probably in a lot better shape. In the span of about 15 seconds I was playing out this whole revenge fantasy. My focus was getting narrower and narrower. All I wanted was to pay him back for what he did to me when I was 16.
Somehow, Brad was able to get through to me. He was squarely facing me and had his hands on my arms, holding me tight. All I remember him saying was my name, over and over, trying to get my attention refocused.
Amanda's boyfriend had no clue what all this was about and he jumped in and tried to get me to tell him the story of what happened. I guess he figured if he could divert my attention, then I might start thinking rationally again.
What everybody said helped get me back to a good place. I was thinking more rationally again and was starting to get my breath back and chill down again.
I also started remembering what my older brother told me after I had been attacked by Asshole Boy and his gang. I remembered him giving me all kinds of support and advice at the time. My parents had gone to the school and reported it to the principal and then went to Asshole Boy's parents to talk to them. My brother really stuck by me for the longest time afterwards.
After weeks passed and my bruises healed, I was feeling calmer, mainly because I knew I was loved and cared for. When I would talk about revenge against Asshole Boy, I remember my brother holding me really tight and saying such incredibly loving things to me. He also advised me to...
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
But here I was all these years later and it all came rushing back toward me. I felt like I had to do something. It was the first time I had run into him after all these years and I didn't want to loose this opportunity to at least say something.
I decided to go over to his booth and I had it all worked out what I wanted to say and do. I told Brad and everybody to keep an eye on what was about to happen. If necessary, I asked them to head over to his booth to back me up.
Somehow I wasn't the least bit afraid this time.
I walked over to the booth, leaned over, stretched both my arms straight out and planted my palms down on the table and looked Asshole Boy straight in the eyes. I locked my stare on his eyes, but said hello to Lisa. I got no response from her. I guess she was still in her "no gender mixing" stance. Oh well.
Then I said to Asshole Boy, "How you doin', man? You remember me, don't you?" He stared back at me, then looked down at his plate.
I said, "Surely you haven't forgotten that nickname you gave me in high school, have you? Let me see..... Oh yeah, 'Cocksucker' is what you called me. That ring any bells, sweetheart?"
He started to slide out of the booth but it was one of those booths with a barrier on one side, and I was blocking the other side. I quickly moved in and sat down next to him and by moving in with a of of determination, I was able to shove him back in. I didn't take my eyes off him. Lisa was saying nothing.
I said to him, "So, I think we have a score to settle. And whether you like it or not, it's going to be settled tonight." He still said nothing.
All I said next was, "We're going to get out of this booth -- right now -- and the two of us walk out of here. There's a group of my friends sitting right over there who are going to follow us, too. They're not leaving my side until this score is settled in full."
I looked over at Lisa and said, "Thanks, honey, for taking care of the bill here. Real nice seeing you again."
Brad met me at the door and I told him me and Asshole Boy were taking a walk down the street to the park to talk. He said they would follow and would stay close by.
While we were walking to the park I noticed that he was still that scrawny little kid he was in high school. That's probably why he needed help from his Asshole Buddies to hold me down while he kicked the shit out of me. Now I easily stood 3 or 4 inches taller than him and I was definitely in better physical shape.
So we get to the park and I see Brad and the others a short distance away. Me and Asshole Boy sat down on the park bench and didn't say anything for a few minutes. I admit I was hoping he was sweating and in a panic inside while we were just sitting there all quiet.
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
Those words came back to me while we were sitting there. Well, all I can say is that the "sleeping dog" was not asleep anymore. I couldn't just walk away.
Then I got things started by asking him, "So, you know why we're here, right?" That's when the shit hit the fan.
It's easy to tell about something after it's over, but while it's happening, it's all just one thing after another flipping past your eyes.
I'm still trying to get my bearings back after what happened. This was not an easy night -- for him or me. The dog was awake. The dog was barking. There were certain things I knew I had to say and do. Some I regret. Some I'm glad about.
Right this exact moment, while I'm writing this, I need to calm myself down. I'll try to finish this tomorrow.
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