Whale

I went to see the attorney this afternoon, she was really sweet.  Basically, there's nothing I can do. There's a clause in divorce papers that is sometimes there, but wasn't in ours (Ex knew what he was doing and might have taken it out!), that allows for claims on property not disclosed in the divorce, if it should later come to light. That entitles you to 75% of the value of the undisclosed.  I was 2 years too late in my claim. If it had just happened, it might have gone differently.

It's ok, I am quite relieved.  I won't have to go to court or pay massive lawyers fees, and have all the trauma and karma of that to look forward to.   I can let it go.  My attorney is a Buddhist, and we had a chat about the 'spiritual' side of it all, and Master, and the manipulation and karmas, she was very cool.  She also didn't charge me, said that was her good deed of the day.  She had quoted me $295 an hour.
So, at least, I am not $300 worse off.  And I know that there's nothing I could do, or can do, and that's a good thing.  I had to find that out.  It's gone..  Its done.. I can move on now. I said to her that I at least wanted some closure, and talking to her had helped with that.
She recommended Pema Chodron's book "When Things Fall Apart". She went through a divorce herself a year and a half ago.  I bet she did a lot better out of it than I did!!

As I was down town, and still had my $300, I went consolation-shopping, and hit Macy's one day sale, and picked up a very nice sexy black designer shirt normally $90, for $23. Nothing can make you feel as fat and pasty and fucking ugly, as a department store mirror.   You'd think they'd have more flattering lighting, so you buy more, not seeing how much of a whale you look in your old jeans that were good 20lbs ago, in the harsh and unforgiving lights.  I tried on a bunch of stuff and decided it all made me look too fat.
I have lost 3lbs since I did the hypno weightloss thing. Not fantastic, but better than gaining some!  And I will lose more, I hope.
 
Talking of whales, I have been wanting to contact my very pregnant girlfriend D for the last few days. We were going to chat tonight, and she texted me to say she couldn't, she was in labour, and could we put it off until after she'd had the baby?  I had to laugh..  Bless her.   I hope everything goes ok.