Husband and I had sex last night, which was great..
I have been on fire lately, and I can feel how this other crush I have on A, has served to really reawaken my bodily interest in sex, not that it ever really went to sleep, but there's a new feeling of need and intensity now that I didn't have previously.
So I didn't orgasm, not through any lack on his part, the sex was great, in fact, I nearly did several times, but I held back. Yogic practices..
I woke up about 5 this morning, and went downstairs to the room we meditate in. I was immediately overtaken by very forceful energy, and thrown into bliss. That's the real reason for sexual abstinence, because if orgasm happens, it's harder to get the body's energies flowing enough to generate that.
Sex isn't God. Sex is bodily energy, natural. But, sex is a doorway for the Divine to enter through, and having built up sufficient sexual energy, it's like it creates the means whereby the Holy Spirit, Shakti, whatever you choose to call it, can enter you and take you over, push you into Ecstasy... I guess a bit like syphoning gasoline. It has to get started somehow.
It's not a matter of prudery or self-righteousness or moral rectitude, just a matter of being aware of energy in the body.
SO long, for so many, many badly wrong reasons, women have been repressed, shamed, shunned, and sex has been pushed underground by religion, when all the while, it was the means God has to truly take us over.. Such a sad and tragic thing we did...
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