Chicken?

I'm getting a little nervous.. And wondering whether or not it might be me that's the tease tonight..
All this intensity, I don't know if I can do this. It really will be a trigger for my entire life changing. No going back.

We're planning on getting stoned together, which will no doubt lead to my saying I don't want him to make his own way home in that state, so... And after my new-found discovery of the sex and pot combination? (I'm about 50 years behind most people, aren't I? I'm 23 years behind myself, since I first ever smoked any. Better late than never.)

And all this tenderness. I really feel that from A, even over a Facebook chat. He was very loving and sweet last night, genuinely so. He really is a unique guy. I am so scared of real emotional intimacy, and that's what's coming at me since I shared my feelings with him. My heart is really opening. How come sometimes the things you want scare you the most when you feel you might actually get them?

Ah, I'm sure I'll manage... ;-)