Tarot

Had an interesting Friday night, we went for Mexican food, and there was a tarot reader/palmist guy there, so when we were done with our meals, we got a reading!  I had palm and tarot, E had palm. He was SPOOKILY accurate, it was great, nailed both of us square on with the palmistry, it was pretty hilarious.  E kept looking at me with this look on his face that said it all. I think he was a little shocked, he'd never had any palmistry done before. I have, I know a good palmist is shit-hot, when they know their stuff.
My tarot was interesting, he said I would have an encounter soon with somebody, and old friend from my past. Well, S is coming to visit in October, and as per usual, I have a lot of trepidation about that.
All else was good though.  One thing he said which is totally true of me, is that I shouldn't gamble, I will never have good luck gambling. I know that about myself, I never do, apart from the odd lottery or scratch card, on which I sometimes win $5 or $10.  I have never liked or understood gambling. It seems such a waste of money.
He also said, as did my astrologer friend a few weeks ago, that I would be making money from something creative soon, and that I would be able to take a year out to play and travel. Now, that would be nice... Fuck knows how, at this point in my life, but.. I live in hope.  I could use a year off from office life.  Careful what you wish for, I know.

I had one of those awful dreams last night, where I am in a room, and the only place to sit is near bitch. Or  I go the bathroom and there she is, we get talking, then I realize who she is and what she's done. I dreamt about Ex last night too, and it just made me feel so sad and angry. I have been having a bad few days, I think triggered by dinner with S in the week. She will always be associated with him, with all that, no matter how much time passes. This time though, she didn't tell me any gossip, which I was grateful for.

Great sex with E this morning. He just gets right up there, you know?  NOt much better than feeling a big dick inside you when you come. Feeling all your muscles contracting during your orgasm, and meeting resistance, meeting a hard cock.   For that I am grateful too. Oh my God. It's been a year now, and the sex is still great. That goes a long way. I do love him. He is good for me.  :)
I think I realized a few days ago though, that I love him, and I'm not 'in love with' him, which isn't necessarily a bad thing!  That sounds negative, but it's not. I actually like not being 'in love with' him in that way, it takes away so much of the stress, and leaves things open just to be what they are. Great sex with somebody I really get on well with, and care a lot about. I think at the moment, that's enough for me. I am happy with E.