11.15 and still no reply from A. Not that I'm obsessing or anything, but my palms are a bit sweaty, and I have hit the 'refresh' button a few times tonight. Thankfully, I have been out to dinner with some girlfriends, which took my mind off things a lot, but to come home, check, and find no reply, and have to go to bed, and wait until the morning, is going to mean a sleepless night.
I guess no news is good news, he's either out having fun, or really thinking about the reply. He is a sweetheart, so no matter what he says, I will know I am cared for, but feeling that possible sexual rejection is hard. Very hard. That knife is starting to twist a little.
One last 'refresh' of my inbox, before I go to bed.. A scary business, this love stuff, isn't it? I can feel my heart out on my sleeve right now, exposed. Right when I said I wasn't going to ever do that again, too.
I shared with my girlfriends, I feel it's important to remain open with them, and not so secretive about all this. Secrecy is the sign of an addict.
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