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Anniversaries

Several big ones this week. My move to the US yesterday, on the 23rd.  Timed deliberately with my Saturn return, all those years ago, to the day.  I saw Ex yesterday evening, as I was driving home past his office. I go that route because it's the only way across the bridge, there is no alternative route. If there was, I would take it. 
Anyway, there he was. Running up the sidewalk, in a hurry to get somewhere. He didn't see me. And thank God he was alone, and Bitch wasn't with him. I dread that.
I couldn't help smile at the 'coincidence'. That's only about the 3rd time I've seen him since we finally parted ways last year.

Then today, mine and E's 1st 'anniversary', our first 'date'. He bought me flowers.  :)  First flowers ever.  They're lovely.

I still can't get over the absolute paradox of how much love I feel for E sometimes, and how broken my heart still is, over Ex. Fuck, I'd take him back in a minute, despite everything, if it wasn't for E. Not that I am ever likely to find that out.
I keep seeing women that resemble Bitch, and getting all mad, and hating on them, until I realize it's not them. Am I paranoid?  ;-)   I mean, it's been 9 months since that disastrous day in November. 
Yes, do the math, there was indeed a 3 month overlap, between Ex and me finally calling it quits, and my hooking up with E.

But I am grateful for E. He is such a source of comfort and love. There's nothing nicer than sinking into him and his couch, at the end of a tough week at work, with a glass of wine and some good tv.  It's womblike, only nicer. There's more legroom.
I never really had that luxury with Ex, we were always off busy doing something or socializing. He never sat still long enough for a good cuddle. I realize how much physical affection I missed out on. And let's face it, that was what I was going looking for when I met A. 
After all the hell I've been through these last 2 years, I feel lucky. I am finally starting to see and feel why all this had to happen. I wouldn't want it to happen again, ever, and I would go back and do a million things differently, to avoid all the shit if I could, but still, today, I am happy.  I feel loved. I feel cuddled and I love to wake up at 3am when I am with E, and find he has his arms wrapped tight around me.

He also has a bigger dick. :) 

In other news, S told me Master has gone back to using his original name, not the 'spiritual' name he adopted a while back. He heard a voice, apparently, telling him to. Funny. I don't know why that should make me smile, but it does. One piece of gossip from S that I didn't mind hearing.  
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