A New Friend, A Girl with "The Lips" and a Soccer God

I'll pick up where I left off from yesterday's post about when Brad and I decided to have "The Talk" about our past relationship and sexual background.

Okay, let's see. Where was I? Oh yeah. Telling Brad about Nancy and I.

So, I was a Freshman in high school when this happened. I've mentioned elsewhere that I came out to my family and some of my close friends when I was 16. And if you remember anything about high school, you know that when one person knows something about you, it's going to get around. Then you have a wind blowing and pretty soon it's obvious there's a wildfire. For the most part, my friends were pretty cool when they found out. There were two who didn't know what to make of it at first, but they eventually came around.

Another thing you may remember about high school (if it was anything like mine) is that when a new kid comes to town and starts a new school, it's usually really hard to learn how to fit in and make friends. There are all these different cliques and everybody is putting you under a microscope. Unless you're some raving beauty or hot jock, it's not an easy thing to find your way around.

There was this new kid (I'll call him Dave) whose family had just moved here from Nebraska or Minnesota (I can never remember all the states in the center part of the country). He was in my class and I still remember his first day. He was a little skinny and very shy, so he was probably going to have a target on his back with some of the other kids. Some people were already whispering that he was "plain-looking." He definitely wasn't going to be sought after by the "Cool Kids." 

Plus, like most new kids in a new school, he had "The Look" of a new kid. Since he was already shy and skinny, he had that "refugee" expression on his face. He looked really lost and really scared but you could tell he was trying not to show any of it, which only make "The Look" more obvious.

For some reason I felt really bad for him. I had never started a new school like he had, so I didn't know from experience what that was like. But it really bothered me a lot that almost everybody was ignoring him. Like he wasn't worth even talking to. You could also tell he had a kind of sad look about him, so he stayed pretty withdrawn.

So, I made an effort to talk to him. I introduced myself and asked if he wanted to sit together during lunch and he could meet some of my friends. He seemed a little spooked by this, but he said, "Yeah. Sure."

Over the next few weeks, I talked to him some more and found out he liked to run and had been on the track team in his last school. So, I told him I usually went for a run just about every day and asked him if he wanted to run together. He seemed really happy about that so we started meeting after school to go for a run, and on the weekends we would meet early in the morning for a little longer run.

The more time we spent together, the more he started opening up about himself. He told me he really missed his girlfriend a lot. They had decided to call their relationship off when he and his family moved, but he still missed her. He asked me if I had a girlfriend and I just decided to tell him the truth. I just said something like, "Nope. No girlfriend. I mean, I like girls, but not like that." (Okay, I know that was a little evasive, but I was still new at the whole coming out thing.) I gotta say, though, he was pretty sharp. He just stared at me and got a really small grin on his face and said, "Oh. Do you have a boyfriend?"

Well, I figured, what the hell. I'm just gonna go for it. I said something like, "No. But I'd really like one." He just nodded and said, "That's cool." Then he went on with something else about school and how he was starting to make a few friends.

He had already been over to my house a few times to study and really liked my family. So he invited me over to his house the next weekend to meet his family and said his aunt, uncle and cousin were also going to be there. That's when I met Nancy, his cousin.

Well, his family was super nice and they were all asking me questions about everything. Unlike Dave, his family was just the opposite. They were really outgoing and not shy one bit about anything. Very open and friendly. And can I say, his cousin, Nancy, was really beautiful. She was also a Freshman but went to a different school in the town where they lived.

Okay, I just heard my mom's voice in my head saying, "Get on with your story, Matt!" So here goes.

She was really, really friendly and asking me all kinds of questions about myself. Favorite music. Favorite sports. Favorite food, even! And again, I'm just going to say, she was really beautiful and had those kind of lips that make you start thinking, I wonder what it would be like to kiss those lips. I didn't know Brad at this time, of course, but he has lips like that, too. So, so kissable.

We were talking about school and what subjects we liked the best and when I said I liked math, she said it was one subject she totally hated. She talked about how hard it was to understand all the rules that go along with math and trying to remember all the different formulas in Algebra was like Greek to her. I told her I would be glad to help her anytime she wanted. Well, she jumped on that and invited me to her home the next week. Hmmmm.

I always liked to explain how to understand any kind of math, and Algebra was a new branch of math we were taking that year and I was catching on pretty easily. And, to be honest, I loved seeing her smile. I'd get to see those lips again. Just saying. Just being honest.

Well, when next week came around and I walked in her room where we were going to study, what huge poster does she have on her wall but one of my favorite soccer (or for those in the UK, football) stars, David Beckham. In case you haven't seen a pic of him, here's one I found for your viewing pleasure: --------------------------------->

Now I ask you... Where do my eyes go when I see this hottie? Huh? Anybody want to take a wild guess? Yep. I think my jaw dropped and I know I was staring like crazy. Also, I think I must have sorta frozen in place and gone into some kind of trance or something.

Nancy was just staring at me looking at the poster and eventually said, "Oh Matt! Earth to Matt."

She asked me if I liked soccer, which she already knew, and I think she was getting maybe a little hint that I liked Mr. Beckham a little more than I liked the game of soccer.

So, we sat at her desk and I started explaining all about equation solving in Algebra. At one point I reached over her notebook and our hands kinda brushed against each other. She turned to look at me and I got The Smile again. And The Smile involved The Lips and for some reason I just smiled back and out of the blue leaned in to those Lips. She didn't mind and I got to feel those Lips on my lips, and, well, one thing led to another.

Pretty soon the bedroom door was closed and when we came up for air, we were on her bed. How'd that happen? Now, do I need to be all explicit here, or do you get the picture. There we were on the bed, fully clothed, making out, our hands starting to travel to various parts of each other's body. And all this happening with Mr. David Beckham, Soccer God, watching.

I had never kissed a girl before, much less a girl with Those Lips. My eyes opened and when they did, all I could see was The Soccer God staring down on us.

I owe Mr. Beckham a lot. He doesn't know it, of course, but he saved me from losing my virginity to this really beautiful girl. In all honesty, that's probably where all this was headed. It was, however, all hormones. Yeah, I thought she was a really beautiful girl, but I knew almost all at once that I had to stop before this went any further. Yeah, I was super horny. I admit it. I also got really scared at the time and had enough sense about me to know that if "It" happened, it would be the only time and Nancy would end up really hating me for using her.

Mr. Beckham and I both knew I was gay. I could just see it in his eyes in that poster that he understood and he was not approving where this was headed.

I sat up on the bed, glanced at Soccer God, looked back at Nancy and just said, "I'm sorry. I think you're really nice and very beautiful, but I just can't do this." She smiled back and said, "I understand." I said, "You do?" She said she knew I was probably gay or bi.

I told her I was gay and asked her how she knew. She said she had asked her cousin, Dave, whether he knew if I had a girlfriend. She said Dave told her I didn't have a girlfriend, but he said it in a way that, for some reason, made her think he was hiding something.

During my talk with Brad, when I was telling him about my relationship and sexual background, he asked me if I thought I was maybe bi. I told him I was completely certain I was gay. Maybe I'll write about that later, but I need to wind this up for now.

My plan is to wrap this up tomorrow. You'll get the real story on how I "lost" or rather "gave" my virginity to someone very special.